


the Right...

by Bolontiku



Series: The Right... [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), MCU, Marvel
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-07
Updated: 2018-09-07
Packaged: 2019-07-08 00:45:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15919524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bolontiku/pseuds/Bolontiku
Summary: You’re coming to terms with being in love with someone you can’t have.





	1. The Right Thing

You watched as Steve leaned against the counter, his baby blue eyes focused on Sharon whom he had pulled close between his thick long legs. He tossed his head back laughing at whatever she said, her hand to her chest.

Freakin’ Captain “Perfect” America.

You ground your teeth and looked down at your papers. You didn't want to be the one making him laugh anyways. Or be that close to him.

“Hey…Y/N!?” Fingers snapped directly in front of your face.

You blinked looking up, face completely blank. “H-hey there Steve!” You looked around quickly before sitting back in your chair and taking a deep breath. “Whats up? Thought you were with Sharon?”

Steve made space on a corner of your desk and carefully perched there as he crossed his arms over his broad chest. You forced your gaze down onto the papers before you and realized you could see his thick thigh from the corner of your eye. “Well yeah, but I looked over to see you looking utterly miserable and thought you could use a coffee. C'mon, I’m treating.”

You started to shake your head when he caught your arm in his large hand and hauled you up with no effort on his part. You shivered as he guided you in front of him, his hands on your waist forcing you forwards. You grumbled at him slapping his hands away and he laughed. That made you smile.

He stared at you as you stared at the menu board. “Hey, Y/N, did I do something wrong?”

You pursed your lips. “What makes you say something like that?” You asked trying to avoid answering.

Steve sighed, “you haven't answered my calls or texts for the last month and don’t say you’ve been working so much cause I asked Sharon and she said you haven’t been working any O.T. So you can’t use work as an excuse.” He leveled a glare at you.

“You asked your girlfriend about me?” You asked perking an eyebrow at him.

Steve rolled his eyes, “she knows there’s nothing going on between you and me. So no need to worry about her being jealous.”

“Steve, can we just get a coffee and stop this?” You asked irritated. No, there wasn't anything to worry about cause he would never think of you like that. You were just his friend, nothing more. It didn't help that Sharon was fucking beautiful and sweet and kind. You needed to get away from him.

Looking up, you jumped realizing he was right in front of you. “Y/N, your making me worry. If I did something can you tell me so I can at least apologize? Its not fair that you won’t tell me.” He pleaded, eyes full of sorrow.

You felt lightheaded, he was too close, if you didn't get away-he cocked his head to the side and leaned closer to you. “Are you feeling okay? You look a little sick…”

You jerked away when he reached up fingers ghosting across your forehead. “Uhm, thanks for the coffee-gotta go!” You hurried away rushing through the lobby.

You shoved the door to the stairs open and leaned against it taking in deep breaths. If you had just leaned forwards…just a little bit.

You yelped as the door behind you pushed you forwards and you turned to catch yourself from falling. A hand closed around your wrist and you crashed against a wall. You moaned a little and looked up to see Steve staring down at you, worry lining his face.

“Gaahhh! Steve! Can you just leave me alone?! Jesus!” You pushed at the wall of his chest under your hands and managed to pull away slightly before he tugged you back around, pushing you against the wall and caging you in by placing his hands on either side of your head.

His eyes flashed with anger, “Y/N! Why are you angry with me? You’re my best friend but lately you’ve been absent from my life and trust me I noticed! What I don’t know is why?!”

Your breathing had become heavy and you looked down, your eyes settling on his belt. Jesus, you couldn't look at him without wanting him! Your lip quivered for a moment. Then you remembered the way he looked at Sharon, how he touched her, the way he smiled when he was with her.

You could never be her.

“Y/N,” he started.

You shoved at his chest, surprise crossed his features and he stumbled back a bit. “Steve, why don’t you just fucking leave me alone alright? There's no reason as to why, it just is. I just got sick of your face is all.” Your stomach rolled as the words left your mouth and you bit back the tears that sprang to your eyes at the hurt look on his face.

He stepped towards you, “Y/N, you cant mean that,” his voice was strained and you dropped your head not wanting to see him cry.

“Dammit Steve, people change. Not everyone has to like you, you know? Grow the fuck up.” You turned away hurrying up the steps before you broke down. Before you told him how you really felt. Before you fucked it up in a way you couldn't fix. This was better. This way he wouldn't think twice about you. This way he wouldn't feel bad or pity you.

____

Bucky held out a beer and Steve looked up at him, it had been a couple days since your fight with him and he was more miserable than ever. He just wanted things to go back to normal. “So, you and Sharon break up?” He asked sitting next to him.

Steve looked over the edge of Avengers Tower and frowned. “It isn’t Sharon. Its Y/N…”

“Hmmm, finally figure it out huh?” Bucky hummed.

Steve looked over at him. “What do ya mean?”

Bucky made a face at him. “You really don't know?!” He asked, “Y/N is head over heels for ya!”

Steve shook his head, “no. No.” He shook his head again and then dropped his head. “Since when?”

“You really are too thick. She fell in love with you before you met Sharon. It’s why I kept pushing you to ask her out. Everyone can tell.”

“What am I gonna do?” Steve asked looking miserable.

“Don’t screw it up?” Bucky answered.

_____

You lugged the last box of your items into your car. Your chest hurt but you couldn’t keep doing it anymore. You had handed over your resignation papers that morning. Effective immediately. If you stayed….you would end up doing something. And having spotted them together this morning had made you certain you were making the right choice. If you left he would never know what happened and you would fuck things up. Cause there was no way he would ever choose you over her. Never. You looked at your phone. Your flight would be leaving in an hour. You had enough time to make it, your neighbor and friend would ship the rest of your stuff for you. You took in a deep breath pulling your car out of the parking spot and slowing when you saw his motorcycle. This was for the best.

Steve saw Sharon and frowned, she smiled up at him. “Hey handsome, whatcha doing here?”

“Have you seen Y/N? I need to speak to her. We need to talk as well.”

Sharon frowned, that didn't sound good. “She quit this morning. Moving back with her family. What would we need to talk about?”

Steve felt a punch to the gut and looked over at your desk. It was empty of anything personal.


	2. The Right One

You set the small buggy laden with floral arrangements into the cooler, jumping when you felt a hand on the small of your back. “Killian! Fuck man you scared me!” You exclaimed pulling an earbud out and raising an eyebrow at him.

His violet eyes danced at you as he ran a hand through his jet black hair, “I figured since I called your name several times. Look, the place is slow and I thought you might wanna take off first?”

“Oh…no, I can't do that.” You smiled ducking your head and tucking a strand of hair behind an ear. The door chimed making you look up, your heart dropped as you saw bright red hair disappear behind the tall display of indoor palm trees. Your heart racing you pushed past your co-worker and hurried down the aisle. You practically ran through the store looking down each aisle and finding no one. Biting down on your bottom lip you moved back to the front of the store. You looked up as Killian caught your face in his hands, one on your forehead. “Ki-”

“You don’t feel hot. So no fever..look,” he smirked down at you and you suddenly understood why there were women galore when he worked, he tsked as he looked at you. “You’ve done nothing but take whatever shifts you can since you moved here. Don’t argue, I know. I used to get all the good shifts. Go home. Get some sleep. If you feel bad then agree to meet me at the coffee place around the corner.”

You quirked your lips and sighed. “Actually, Emily and her husband rent the apartment above the shop to me. So…”

Killian leaned against the counter as you heard the computer chime with an online order. “I’ll get it! Go get some sleep, you got about three hours then I’m coming to get you!”

You nodded. Honestly you could use some sleep, hallucinating about seeing Natasha in your shop. There was no way. You shook your head as you made your way to the back and up the stairs to your one bedroom apartment.

Killian watched you go, he had finally gotten the chance to ask you for coffee! Today was a good day, he smiled nodding to himself and turned as the door to the shop opened and he looked across the counter to meet steely blue eyes. “Hi! Welcome to Emily’s Floral! What can I do to help you?”

“Lookin’ for a girl,” the guy handed him a picture and Killian stared down at your face. He kept from tensing up and shrugged his shoulders. The man in front of him was his height but was more muscled than himself. Killian didn't like his look, and he wasn't about to hand you over to some stranger. He may have only known you for three months but he liked you.

“Sorry man, she may have come in once or twice but…honestly I get hit on so much I rarely know who I’m calling at two am ya know?” He smirked leaning on the counter.

The stranger with dark hair glared at him for a second, glancing around the shop quickly before snatching the picture back. He turned on his heel and stormed out. Killian let out a sigh and legit jumped when he noticed a woman step up. “Jesus! Your quiet!” He laughed nervously. “That be all for you?” He asked straightening.

The redhead with green eyes smiled up at him. “Yes, Killian?” She asked reaching out to run her fingers over his name tag.

“Uhhhhh, huhh,” he felt a blush brighten his cheeks. He knew this type of woman, she would never go for a guy like himself. He was handsome enough, he knew that. Was confident in his looks…but this lady. She was a shark. She devoured and spit the likes of him out just for a snicker. He looked at the register determinated not to make himself look a fool and rang her order in.

Natasha chuckled. She had seen him send you home. You had disappeared a second before Bucky walked in. She had seen the guy quickly assess Bucky and lie to him. Bucky had looked over, a second of communication flickered between them and he had left.

“Well, you have a good day.” She paid and nodded at him throwing him a wink as she left.

_____

Two months prior.

“What you doing handsome?”

Steve jumped as Sharon walked into his office. He quickly closed out a few tabs on his laptop. “Nothing, ready for lunch?”

She pursed her lips and crossed her arms over her chest. “You never ask me who the guy in the blue jacket is.” Steve froze, he looked up at her. “Used to be any guy walked within five feet of me and you would ask who he was and what he was doing in my office. Yeah, I knew what you were doing being jealous and cute…since Y/N left….you’ve been distant. You never spoke to me. Whatever that was supposed to be.” She ran a hand through her blond silky hair, her blue eyes locking with his own.

Steve stood, “what are you saying?”

“His name is Craig. He’s a special ops guy we hired on through an agency. I’ve gone out with him a couple times. Nothing serious just coffee…”

“Just coffee?” Steve scoffed.

Sharon stood to her full height, “don’t give me that! I am not gonna play second fiddle to a memory! She left and you two weren’t even a thing! You two never made it past friendship and suddenly I’m the one that has to feel bad?” She moved forwards poking him in the chest, “I asked! I ASKED YOU! If there was anything between you two and you said no! Then you start acting funny cause she doesn't answer a few texts and suddenly she leaves and you…you what Steve?!” She turns away annoyed, frustrated. Not sure.

Sharon continues in a softer tone of voice, facing him again, “We’ve been different since she up and left. I tried to get you to talk and you only pushed me away. What am I supposed to do?” She stabbed her hands through her hair and Steve reaches out to grab her. Hold her. Comfort her. He’s not sure what to do when she pulls away.

“No, you don’t get to do that! Not now.” Sharon sighs. “I don’t hate her. She left, and I can only guess that she did it to not screw this up,” she motions between them. “Its had the opposite effect,” Steve shares a grimace with her. “I know you didn't set out to hurt me. I know whatever you two had between you…was different. I never questioned it. I don’t doubt that you two were anything but friends. It’s just..” She reaches up to touch his cheek, “I deserve to be happy too. Living in the shadow of your best friend is not ideal for me. Go find her. Tell her how you feel. Be happy you jerk.”

Steve is never without words, but this time he doesn’t know what to say. Sharon squeaks as he catches her up in his large arms and kisses her. She laughs at how different it is. Once full of lust and passion this is nothing more than a friendly thank you.

“You deserve the best in life!” Steve smiles at her.

“Yeah, yeah….you’re an ass you know?” She shoots back wriggling to get free.

_____

You woke up with enough time to get dressed and headed down. “Killian?” He hurried over, pulling his apron off as he moved around the counter. “You look great!” He smiled leading you out the shop.

“Killian! Why in such a rush?” You asked as he practically pushes you out the side door. It doesn't take long to get to the small cafe, they’ll be open for another two hours. “Killian!”

He pulls you behind him to the back of the cafe, sitting the two of you in a booth. “What are you running from?” He asks hurriedly as a waitress comes over and takes your orders.

You frown at him, “nothing!” You are taken aback as he rolls his eyes at you. “Seriously! Why?!”

Killian shakes his head. “What kind of trouble are you in Y/N? Look you came out of nowhere just three months ago. Telling the Bridges that you needed a job, a place to stay and all cause you had a falling out with your family.”

You look at your lap, it was true. Your family wanted you to use your connections at the Avengers tower to get information on them to sell to tabloids. You had left driving randomly till you came across the town and found the floral shop needed a new worker. You had taken the sign and walked in.

“None of that is a lie. I’m not running from anyone,” you let out a humorless laugh when the waitress came back with your coffee’s.

Killian had relaxed a bit. “I know how hard it can be starting over from scratch, that's why I’ve watched you since you got here. You’re a hard worker, your funny, your such a nerd!” He smiled shaking his head, he reached out dropping his large hand over yours. “You can talk to me, I’ll help you.”

You let out a shuddering breath, “thanks,” you looked up at him, “I… I lied. I am running. But its nothing serious!” You add when he perks an eyebrow. “I fell in love with a guy-he was my best friend. I had no right to fall in love with him. He uh, he was dating someone anyways.” You look out the window watching as traffic passes by, not paying attention to the people passing by.

You didn't see the two that walked across the street and into the cafe. “Killian, I just,” you laughed looking back at him. His violet eyes unwavering from your face, “I was tired of not being seen. And I was afraid of telling him when he was so obviously in love with her.”

“I see you,” you felt a shiver run through you at the words, and it took you a moment to realize it hadn't been Killian to say those words. No, those words had come from your left.

You watched as Killian looked over and up. But you didn't have to look to know who’s voice that belonged to. You heard it every night in your dreams.

“Get lost,” came the voice again as you concentrated on breathing. He wasn’t here…it wasn’t real. He would never come for you.

Killian laughed, “look buddy, I ain’t going anywhere-”

“Killian?” Your voice sounded small even to yourself.

He was up and in front of you, his hands framing your face. You had watched those hands for months. Killian had been the one to train you. Teaching you how to cut the ends of bundles of flowers at once. How to arrange them, how to quickly file away orders. You had watched his hands dance across the keyboard. Killian had been a steady staple in your life.

Why had you never looked at him before?

“I’m sorry!” You whispered.

Killian smiled softly. “Hell, Y/N! No need to cry! Lets get out of here, yeah?” He asked waiting for your reply.

“Y/N, we need to talk.”

You didn't have a chance to breath, Killian was up and pushing him away. “Look man! I don’t know who you are but your not touching her!”

A few other patrons looked over. You recognized them, they would come in and you would fix them flowers to apologize to their wives with. They stood and started your way.

“No!” You stood up, quickly pushing your way in between Killian and Steve. Finally you let yourself look at him. Your hands on his broad chest felt like they were burning, you felt as if you were breathing in fire. “Stop!?” Your entire back was pressed into Killian's chest holding him back, his hands at your waist. “Please Killian?!” You pushed off of Steve to turn and look at him. Placing your hands on his jawline he finally looked down at you. “Please Killian? I promise I’ll be okay..”

“Is this him?” He asked looking up at the tall blond that stood not two feet away now. He pulled you behind him. “You’re not touching her buddy!”

Steve stepped back, “I would never willingly hurt Y/N!” He defended. “Y/N, please?” His blue eyes begged you as you peeked out from behind Killian. “Just…talk to me?” He begged.

Full on puppy look. Bastard.

You tugged on Killian's shirt. “I’ll be okay, I promise. Go home, I’ll call you tomorrow.”

He looked at you, stare intense. “Y/N…” He sighed and reached into his pocket dropping a few bills onto the table. He caught you by the back of the neck and pulled you into him, before his lips fell on yours. You tensed for a second before relaxing into the kiss. He pulled away and smiled brightly at you, “alright little one. Have a good night. If you need me you have my number.”

You watched him walk away, you stomach tightening with nerves. As Killian walked out the door you saw Nat and Bucky sink back into a booth by the door. You let your gaze meet the one of the men that had stood, coming to your defense even as Killian walked by them, you nodded smiling softly and waving a hand in front of you.

You let out an exasperated sigh as you turned to look at Steve. “What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be….I don’t know? Signing marriage invitations by now?!”

“Jesus Y/N, great to see you too!” He grinned at you. He motioned for you to take a seat and so you took it. The waitress came back around taking Killian's cash and drink and bringing back a new one for Steve.

Your heart was thundering in your chest. Why was he here?!

“I…” Steve looked at his coffee as if it would give him the answers to the universe. “I miss you,” he breathed out simply.


	3. The Right Choice

You stared at him from across the table. He isn’t looking at you, instead staring at the cup of coffee he is fidgeting with. You take a moment to really look at him, since he won’t meet your gaze.

You never really dared to stare, but glanced at him in pieces over the last couple years. Ever since you’d realized you had fallen in love with him you only stole small glances.

He looked liked he hadn’t slept in a week. His eyes darkening underneath, though his long lashes swept down they didn’t cover the circles. He bit down on his plump bottom lip making you want to do it for him. He had grown a beard, which made you wonder if they allowed him since he was the Perfect Captain America?

You kept staring even as he finally raised those baby blues to look at you. “Y/N?”

“What? You want me to melt into a puddle just because you said you miss me? You can’t just show up out of nowhere say that and expect….what do you expect?” You asked leaning forwards a bit in curiosity.

He leaned back, blowing out a huff of air. “Is he….your boyfriend?”

“What if he is?” You bit out quickly.

Steve looked down, he was too late. He fucked it up. “I-I, Y/N, I can’t tell you how stupid I am!” He choked out.

You sat back astounded. “Steve…what are you doing here? You have Sharon, you two are perfect together. I mean, I see the way you look at her! The way you touch and kiss her,” your heart hurt at the memories. “I can see that one day you two will get married and have kids together. The white picket fence life style for you two. If I go back, I’ll ruin it!”

“How?” He asked looking at you. Demanding you to voice it, he needed to hear you say it.

You closed your eyes, this wasn’t fair. He was here to take you back? To make sure you stayed friends? What did he want from you? You couldn’t do this again. 

“I have to go.” You murmured softly and stood. You needed air.

“Y/N!” He stood following you and turning back to leave some cash on the table. He hurried out the door not sparing a glance at the two that sat right there. “Y/N!” He caught your arm spinning you around to face him.

“Steve!” Your agitated, unsure of what was going on, the feelings raging in a tumultuous knot in your stomach. What did he want? “I am not going back just to be your friend, so that you can pull me out of bed to tell me shit that you won’t tell Sharon. To spend my days fretting about you when you spend your days with her! I won’t be the one you seek out after a mission to chatter to while I try to patch up what will only heal faster than I can blink! And you make me worry, all the damned time! I worry about you and I can’t get you out of my head! And it hurts! You don’t see me!”

While you had pulled away as you shouted at him he caught your chin in his hand, lifting it so you were looking up at him. “Y/N…I can’t sleep without you nearby. I miss our YouTube marathons, I miss hearing you sing when you don’t realize I’m standing right behind you, I miss dancing with you…”

“Find another friend then! Fuck get Bucky to dance with you!” The thought made you giggle but you sobered just as quickly, “I left… I left because it hurt more than anything to see you happy with someone else. I can’t stand on the sidelines anymore, and I won’t be the reason you break up with her when you realize how I feel for you. And I don’t want your pity either!” You jerk away from him fighting the tears as your chest tightens. 

You won’t cry. Not in front of him. You need to get home.

“How you feel about me?” You freeze as he says this. You said it. Oh, God. “Y/N, please look at me….”

“You're so dumb Steve, I don’t even know how I hid it this long. Maybe you just… I don’t know.” You sigh exhausted. Exhausted from hiding how you feel. Exhausted from seeing him again and all the emotions coming back up. Just exhausted.

“You say I’m dumb, but haven’t you figured out why I’m here?” He waits as you stand there, back to him. You don’t want to hope for something that's not real. “Y/N, look at me.” He presses you to turn around, and you do, tears on the verge of falling. “I’m here for you, I’m not with Sharon.”

Your lip quivered, “Steve,” you close your eyes rubbing them hard to fight the tears, “I didn’t want to be the reason… I’m sorry!”

“Who’s the dumb one now?” He chuckled grabbing you and pulling you tight against him, pulling your hands away he stares down at you, “please tell me that guy isn’t your boyfriend?”

“He might be,” you can’t help but tease him.

“Does he have family? Bucky and Nat will inform them of his passing-” he says thoughtfully as he dips his head down to press his lips against yours.

You tense for a second, Steve is kissing you. Steve is kissing you and his arms are wrapped around you. Steve is kissing you! You frown as he pulls away and perks an eyebrow at you. “What?”

Steve rolls his eyes, “stop thinking!” He growls before kissing you again. This time you kiss back, a small noise of content leaves him as you relax in his arms. When he pulls away you pout and he laughs, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry it took me so long to realize it was you.” He sighed as you stared up at him, “it’s always been you. Y/N, I just didn't want to lose you. Lose what we had. But when you left-not even saying goodbye, I couldn’t do anything. It took me too long to understand and I’m sorry.”

“Steve?” He looked at you in question, “you talk too much, fucking kiss me.”

And he did.

This. This was the right choice.


End file.
